An "incult"? What the hell is that?

Uncle Milty WAS 93, after all, so he had a good innings. Luckily, I too am too young to know much about Milton Berle, but I am very much aware of Dudley Moore.

Especially since emigrating to the UK where I learned Dudders has done much much more than just "Arthur" and "10".

He was the other half of the "Derek & Clive" duo partnered with that other British comic, Peter Cook. "Derek & Clive" recorded several comedy sessions for Richard Branson's, then, fledgling Virgin Music/Media empire where they would indulge in the most filthy and outrageous ad lib sessions picking on just about every sacred cow known to man.

My personal favourite is where Dudley plays Mother to Peter Cook's Son, whose "ticket" was a fond memory of hers, as she was used to "flicking it!" Son doesn't want Mother to mention his "ticket" let alone call it a "ticket." He much prefers the clinical name: penis, but Mother doesn't want THAT word spoken in HER house.

Another fave, was the pair describing the things that give them the "horn." Derek (Dudley) says everthing gives him the horn. Even the word "horn" gives him the horn. Clive (Peter) recalls how the funeral of a previous Pope gave him the horn; that the deceased Papa looked "all vunerable like" as he lay in state.

Oh, and the medical condition: Lobstericimus Bumbikissimus, or more commonly, Lobsters up the Bum. Apparently, according to "Clive," Jane Mansfield was a kind, gentle and generous woman. A saint, all except for the lobsters coming out of her bumhole. "Post hoct to proct", says Clive.

Or where Clive is attempting to get into the Guinness Book of Records for having the longest string of snot trailling from his nose. He asks his wife to get the camera to record his attempt but she arrives too late, the string of snot has snapped. Clive is obviously quite upset by this so instead, he plans on using (abusing) his wife to get a totally different record.

There are many other, much more foul and offensive sketches so if anyone's interested, they should certainly check it out. Be warned, though, this stuff is NOT for the easily offended.

Dudley, and Milton, will be missed.

"They're all c*nts out there!" - D. Moore (Derek)

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