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| Originally Posted by DeathTöngue I have some concern with the current PC attitude that any man that wants to participate in his child's upbringing must be some kind of child molester. |
I agree, but I know only too well, from my working life, that child molesters try and gain access to children through this type of work. Whilst its a pain in the rear, in essence its only trying to protect the vulnerable.
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| Originally Posted by DeathTöngue I know you're joking, and I don't think most kids are raised all that well |
I was quite serious! Both Mrs E and I have commented many times on how well mannered American children are. However I dare say you have your fair share of little perishers as well.
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| Originally Posted by DeathTöngue We don't just let things go. One of us is at home all the time, and our kids are being taken care of by the right people - their parents. We don't beat our kids, though spankings aren't unknown - they're just reserved for the truly exceptional, and usually for something that could cause injury or accident. An example would be reaching for things on the stove, etc., where the consequences are truly horrible and yet unimaginable to a child.The idea is that some things have to go right past the frontal lobes into the hindbrain, and a few swats to the butt can be the fastest way there.
But if they're acting up - and that includes rudeness, disobedience, whatever - it isn't allowed to go unremarked, and there's always a consequence, be it sitting in a chair, no TV, no treats, etc.And we always - ALWAYS! - leave room to escalate. If sitting in the chair isn't working, there's standing in the corner, and so on.
Now, my kids are four and seven, and haven't really gotten old enough to cause real problems. But it's my guess that by teaching them self-discipline now, they'll have it when they need it. |
I think you have summed up in that paragraph what good parenting is all about. Again drawing on the experience of my working life, I know that many children don't get that loving, caring environment. Over here it's not uncommon for some kids never to get a home cooked meal or a hug. Both my kids are in their 20's and I'm thankful to say that I have a wonderful relationship with both of them. Many parents can't say that...and that is very sad.