Favorite Recipies

I've been watching Gordon Ramsay's "Kitchen Nightmares" series, (which is hilarious, BTW) and hear a lot about "curry". I don't have any idea what the bloody hell it is, however, as a type of food. Indian food? I'd like to try it.

Yes Gordon Ramsay's 'Kitchen Nightmares' is hilarious, it is sooo stage managed its laughable! Most folks in Scotland think Gordon Ramsay is a big jessie ( light on the loafers!). Curry is fabulous Indian food and can get the old endorphins going ( think sex Strat..remember that warm glow). The ritual over here ( at least in Scotland) is for people to go out for an evenings (serious) drinking ( usually about 15-20 pints of beer) and then at the end of the evening ( 2am) visit a Curry House. The revellers will then order

a) Tikka Masala ( a creamy curry dish mostly ordered by women)

b) prawn or lamb Madras ( not a bad kick)

c) a Vindaloo ( bum burning stuff)

* only a few restaurants in Scotland make a Phall curry which is hotter than the vindaloo- you can't taste bugger all--just hot..hot...HOT!

the revellers will then abuse the Indian waiters in a drunken playful manner by calling them Sabu or Gandhi. The waiters will smile politely and then spit in the curry ( in the confines of the kitchen)

where is SIMON when we need him...

last nite i stopped at a new chain in town called WING CITY GRILL...i ordered Chicken Wings, "hot with lots of sause."...they were so hot my eyes were watering and they were floating in about a quarter inch of hot sause..if anyone lite a cigarette within 10 feet of me a flash fire would have ignited...

I love hot food. Thai is my favourite.

Thanks for reminding me! I nearly forgot about the final part of the Scottish Curry Ritual* The lighting of the farts* This part of the ritual is usually carried out by the younger members of the Scottish community. This happens once they get home after a good nights drinking and with a good curry under their belts. On getting home the young ones will break open the drink, and consume quite a few drams. This will lead to playful banter and speaking in an unintelligible language...we call this 'speakingshit'. The young ones will say things like 'you're my besstusmate' and 'didyou see the jugs on that barmaid' at this point someone usually claims that they can ignite a fart. This is followed by much huffing and puffing, along with facial contortions, whilst at the same time they will be warming their backside with the flame from a lighter. Invariably they will light the cushion on the chair. At some point someone will actually achieve ignition, this is usually followed by howls of laughter from the other chaps.

Ooh, Gordon Ramsay... number 14 on the 'list', currently.


Curry is pretty grand stuff, 'specially when it's hot.