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#1
10-06-2004, 04:09 PM
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| A Place Called... The Poem Just a barely rhyming free verse that came to me one day, that day, mind you, grammar didnt care to visit. A Place Called...: The day is gray Let us lay around and ponder Some sounds rhythmic and comforts others wild and humbles Drift to another being Time is lost but reminds you "DING, DING" Straining to stand, roots are lifted stances bent in one direction The different sounds become one seperate twins re-united in this special place called.... Falsly trusted truths flicker is it worth it to bicker? The weak fall into oblivion Strong, weakened, let time mend thier strength will not end. The world rolls on in a diiferent way. The innocent & pure never cease to play. Which dream to fall next? Is one truer? One is surely Bluer. DING, DING Reasons are found When your feet don't touch the ground An Eye in the sky has an omnicent view This assumes to much the eye isn't empty Flicker, Bicker Are values right? Wrapped too tight? Gray is the day Gray is the night Attraction found in unlikely places do they even look at faces? Surronded by blood future shaken DING DING As it passes THe day is Bright The night dark Which one is truer? which one is bluer? Choices are made or flaot in the middle it wouldn't hurt to pick up a fiddle Judging if judgement matters Testing to see if it flatters Gray Here, Brigth above, Dark Beyond past that? past that? Leaving here to return inside, hope i have nothing to hide DIng, Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding , Ding, Ding, Ding
__________________ Can Loca Ride? Last edited by BreathingPink : 10-06-2004 at 05:11 PM.  |
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#2
10-06-2004, 04:20 PM
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| Re: A Place Called... The Poem I thought it was mildly amusing at times, while angst ridden at others, all with a hint of sadness. I think one or two more "DING DINGS" and you'd have a winner
__________________ Don't hate me because I'm gifted |
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#3
10-06-2004, 04:37 PM
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| Re: A Place Called... The Poem sooooooooooooooooo whats this all about?
__________________ "I like to think that oysters transcend national barriers" "Ashes and diamonds, foe and friend, we were all equal in the end" "...So much behind us...still far to go...still far to go..." April 5, 2006 was amazing  |
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#4
10-06-2004, 05:14 PM
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| Re: A Place Called... The Poem well what is it about, i was bored thinking about my girlfriend and the world as i was confined to a gray dark room as hurricane jeanne passed over head, not really cohesive, haha, but neither am i. i was listening to animals by pink floyd also, really wanting some food.
__________________ Can Loca Ride? |
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#5
10-06-2004, 05:16 PM
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| Re: A Place Called... The Poem i appreciate feed back, and you can name the place too, and mind you, KFC is horrible, at least in my town, service is non existent and so is brains... sorry to any kfc employees, being a member of this site excludes u from my judgement.
__________________ Can Loca Ride? |
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#6
10-08-2004, 11:46 PM
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| Re: A Place Called... The Poem Quite interesting. I like it.
__________________ to let me in from the cold, turn my lead into gold 'cause there's chill wind blowing in my soul and I think I'm growing old |
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#7
10-16-2004, 10:30 PM
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| Re: A Place Called... The Poem thanks rcmno, ur stuff is insightful to say the least
__________________ Can Loca Ride? |
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