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#1141
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! |
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#1142
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! Quote:
Her label? |
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#1143
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! Quote:
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#1144
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! See the thread title, Big Boy |
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#1145
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! Quote:
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#1146
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! best site names 1. A site called ‘Who Represents‘ where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name… wait for it… is www.whorepresents.com 2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views at www.expertsexchange.com 3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at www.penisland.net 4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at www.therapistfinder.com 5. Then of course, there’s the Italian Power Generator company… www.powergenitalia.com 6. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales: www.molestationnursery.com 7. If you’re looking for computer software, there’s always www.ipanywhere.com 8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church. Their website is www.cummingfirst.com 9. Then, of course, there’s these brainless art designers, and their whacky website: www.speedofart.com 10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? Try their brochure website at www.gotahoe.com |
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#1147
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! I like this one: George Bush and Dick Cheney are talking, when Bush suddenly complains "I hate all the dumb George Bush jokes people tell about me." Cheney, feeling sorry for his "boss," says "Oh, they're only jokes. There are a lot of truly stupid people out there. Here, I'll prove it to you." Cheney takes Bush outside and hails a cab. "Please take me to 29 Nickel Street to see if I'm home," says Cheney. The cab driver, without saying a word, drives them to 29 Nickel Street. Cheney looks at Bush and says, "See! This guy is really stupid." George Bush agrees. "He really is a dummy. There was a pay phone just around the corner. You could have called instead." |
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#1148
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| Team work |
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#1149
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| Re: Team work Exactly like the organisational structure of my firm...except the other guy digging around a different piece of ground - out of shot - is me, not polish and sadly, not a manager. |
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#1150
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife; "listen this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes; He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you. To which the wife responds: "he wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!! |
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#1151
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! If Superman and The Flash had a race, who would win? Chuck Norris |
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#1152
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust. |
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#1153
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! |
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#1154
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! On a Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D. C., Senator John Kerry's campaign manager visited the Cardinal of the Catholic cathedral. He told the Cardinal that John Kerry would be attending the next day's sermon, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Kerry to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling Kerry a saint. The Cardinal replied, "No, I don't really like the man, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Kerry's views." Kerry's manager then said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 to your church if you'll just tell the congregation you see Kerry as a saint" The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can use the money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon." As Kerry's manager promised, Senator Kerry appeared for the Sunday sermon and seated himself prominently at the edge of the main aisle. During the sermon, as promised, the Cardinal pointed out that Senator Kerry was present. Then the Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While Senator Kerry's presence is probably an honor to some, he is not my favorite person. Some of his views are contrary to those of the church, and he tends to flip-flop on many other views. John Kerry is a petty, self absorbed hypocrite and a nit-wit. John Kerry is a liar, a cheat, and a thief. John Kerry is the worst example of a Catholic I've ever personally witnessed. He turned on his buddies in Vietnam. He wrote a book and portrayed himself in the best light when he was a traitor to his fellow servicemen. He has lied about his military record and had the gall to put himself in for three medals. He married for money and is using it to lie to the American people. He also has a reputation for shirking his senatorial obligations both here, in Washington and in Massachusetts. He simply isn't to be trusted." The Cardinal completed his view of Kerry with, "But, when compared to Senator Ted Kennedy, Senator Kerry is a saint." |
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#1155
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| Re: A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX! Quote:
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