A JOKE--And it's just a joke, RELAX!

__________________
When Bucks Fizz’s tour bus crashed they all survived. When Metallica's bus crashed Cliff Burton died. Why?

All credit to Ms Bette Midler.

__________________
Count me in on the journey, don't expect me to stay.

to be honest, A Talking Head's joke really pissed me off. I read that so carefully trying not to miss a word and find out what was in the box, and all I get is "I can't tell you, you're not a monk" shit?!?

f**k you!

__________________

"Live for today, gone tomorrow, that's me, HaHaHaaa!"

Take it easy, Lucifer Sam.

ATH gets that reaction a lot and not just on this topic, but what're ya gonna do?

Big ears,
Byron

__________________
Count me in on the journey, don't expect me to stay.

Q/How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

A/Put it in the microwave until it's Bill Withers.



Da da da da da da da: Angus!

__________________
When Bucks Fizz’s tour bus crashed they all survived. When Metallica's bus crashed Cliff Burton died. Why?

Pick-up lines:

You: Do you use windex on your clothes?

Chick: No, why?

You: Because I can see myself in your pants.


You: Are you tired?
chick: no, why?
You: Because you've been running through my mind all day.

You: Did it hurt?
chick: Did what hurt?
You: When you fell from heaven.

These are riots!!!

Feel free to use them. WARNING: You might get called a loser.

_________________
I deficate, therefore I am!

__________________
Sharp-distance

Or the classic:

Q: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
A: My eggs?
Q: Yeah. Scrambled or fertilized?

LOSER!!!

__________________
Count me in on the journey, don't expect me to stay.

Or you can always ask a girl if she wants to go out for a pizza and a f*** and when she says, "That's disgusting!" you reply with, "What? You don't like pizza?"

__________________
stchrissie is not me.

What, no more bad jokes? Come on people.

Q: What do you do if you've dropped your keys in San Francisco?

A: Kick them to San Jose and pick them up!

Q: What do a drum solo and an Orgasm have in common?

A: You can see them both coming but theres nothing you can do about it!

cheers

__________________

Cancel the apocalypse
Cartons of the milky way with pictures of a missing planet
Last seen in pursuit of an American dream

Look, if I'm repeating mysef, then it's not an intentional gaffe, but I couldn't be arsed going back through all the previous jokes to check:

Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?

Because anyone that can run, jump or swim is already in the US



What's Dick Van Dyke's real name?

Penis Van Lesbian

By proxy,

Mark

__________________
When Bucks Fizz’s tour bus crashed they all survived. When Metallica's bus crashed Cliff Burton died. Why?

Actually, quite funny.

Warning!!! The following is very naughty.





A young man is taking a tour of his new job, when his employer points out a barrel with a hole in it, and says "That is the BJ barrel, anytime during the day you want a bj just stick your d*ck in there and you'll get one."

Monday thru Thursday, the new employee went to the barrel on every break and sometimes would sneak one when he shouldn't have. On Friday, he was about to assume his normal duties when his supervisor asked him what he was doing.

"Just my job," he replied.

"Oh no," said the supervisor. "Today is your day in the barrel."

__________________
stchrissie is not me.

i find that very offensive being a mexican and all.

__________________
last orders please.

And notice that where it says location, you put California. Point proven.

__________________
stchrissie is not me.