Christmas is coming..yes it is...ho-ho-ho

Believe it or not, our local shopping centre (what our American brethren would call 'a Mall’) is advertising a Christmas puppet show starting soon. I also note that a number of hotels have already been taking bookings for Christmas day and they are displaying their Christmas menu in their windows!
Anyway I suppose we will all have to start thinking about the presents we will be buying for friends and family. Why not start shopping early? That’s what the shopkeepers want!
So what would you buy for someone on this website? For example, our hard working moderators.

Perhaps you would buy Fulgham a pair of bicycle clips or Lars a year’s supply of cigarette papers. Imagine the look of Dr Cheese on Christmas day, his little face all aglow, when he unwraps a new CD by Ken Dodd and a pair of socks. Maybe you would buy Fixxy that electric whisk that he’s always saying he wanted or Sydney, a Rolf Harris Stylophone.
Over to you folks what would you buy, and why?

I'd buy Eddie a 'feacal intruder' without the instructions

I'd buy Ed a months vaccation time away from his M-i-L when she comes visiing

oh shit!!

So you would buy 'oh shit'? Is that a laxative or something?

I refuse to acknowledge this thread even exists, and shame on Axe Victim for buying into the accelerated holiday shopping craze by giving the assorted bloodsuckers free advert time here. For shame! Tsk tsk and very much tut tut.

And you are ignoring it by posting in it??

It's for the children, I hear...

By posting on it you have already acknowledged its existence! C'mon BoaB don't tell me that you aren't thinking about buying a nice Christmas pressie for some of the mods? Shop early for Christmas, and you will be able to buy Dr Cheese those new diamante earings that he's always wanted.
hohoho

Byron is just upset cause he got an apron, two potholders, and a frying pan--rather than the pearl necklace he had been hoping for--from his SO last Xmas.

aaaaaahhhh that explains all!

Only 72 shopping days to go.......

Xmas is coming the 5th of December...

I am excited about Christmas.

That's it?!?! I'd better get movin'.

I tried to warn all you lot earlier this year...would you listen....nahhhhhhhhhhh